Stories Of Summer : Sacrificing Memories by Jessica Turner
SACRIFICING MEMORIES
BY JESSICA TURNER
Do you love how you look in a swimming suit?
I don’t.
Summertime makes me painfully aware of my body. Since having my son, Elias, two years ago, my curves are curvier, my tummy is softer, and my breasts are saggier.
My bikinis lay in a pile on the bottom shelf of my closet, along with dust bunnies and forgotten stilettos. For some reason, I can’t part with them, though I know I will likely not wear them again.
However, that doesn’t mean I don’t go swimming with my son.
It just means I wear a one-.jpgece. :)
I refuse to miss his high-.jpgtched pool-induced giggles because of my insecurities.
I refuse to let other women’s judging eyes at the pool prevent me from exposing his eyes to the wonder the sun glittering on the water.
I refuse to let my self-image influence his.
I refuse to sacrifice memories with my son because of a soft tummy.
Because at the end of the day, it is not about me.
It is about him.
I want him to remember his mom twirling him in the pool.
I want him to remember water fights.
I want him to remember jumping off the edge of the pool into my arms.
I want him to remember that his mom was there, with him.
As a reminder to myself of this desire to never sacrifice memories because of my insecurities, I created this layout:
THE STORY : Some of my favorite summertime memories are taking you to the pool, Elias. Since you were born in July, you were almost one the first time we took you, and from that moment, you've been a water baby. While my body doesn't look as good in a swimming suit since having you, I like putting one on more because it means I get to now swim with you! I love splashing together, twirling you in my arms, and you jumping into my arms. I love being your mommy.
photos: summers 2009 & 2010; journaling June 2010
Today, I hope to encourage you to push your insecurities aside. Put on that bathing suit. Run through the sprinkler. Jump in the pool. Splash.
Have fun.
Your child will remember those moments and your freedom – not how you looked in your swimming suit.
ABOUT JESSICA : Jessica Turner blogs at The Mom Creative where she discusses “a little bit of this and that” including crafting, parenting, faith, photography and great deals. She is also a writer for DaySpring’s (in)courage, Southwest Airlines’ official mommy blogger and a teacher for Big Picture Scrapbooking.
SPECIAL OFFER : For 20% off her BPS class: Don’t Blink: Scrapbooking Your Child’s First Year, please use the code: blogblink. (Offer expires: 12/20/2010)
This encourages -- and makes me smile -- and say YES! Bring on summer and kids and good memories -- and begone insecurities!
Fantastic post!
Thank you!
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WOW...can I so relate to this! Thanks for it!
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Great post! I feel the exact same way and honestly when I am at the pool with my son I forget about my insecurities because he is having so much fun.
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So day you will complain about your baby weight and someone will ask you how old your baby is....that is why I had baby number 3....your excuse doesn't work anymore when your baby is 4
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Every mother should read this post! Thanks for encouraging moms to get in the pool and enjoy the summer days with thier children!
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More than 25 years later...I adore my photos (and vidoes) of me dancing in a sprinkler with my now 26 year old son!
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Even though I will never have the perfect body and flat, rock hard stomach or high perky bottom when my son looks at me, he loves me. Not my body or my clothes or my new earrings. He loves to blow on my tummy and make noises, its the cutest thing and I would not trade it for anything. Viva mommas and their one piece swimsuits!
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I have already missed so many of those moments with my girls because of my insecurities. But no more....I just went to a waterpark with my girls today and even went on the toilet bowl slide. They couldn't believe I did it and I even went first. :)
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I moved into a house with a pool two weeks ago. I still haven't put my swimsuit on, and I know it's more about my insecurities than about the busy life I use as an excuse.
I needed this one. Thank you.
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When I was a young mom, several decades ago, my dear friend jumped into the water in a two piece suit showing stretch marks and all and proudly announced that they were her badge of motherhood. From that day on I had a completely different feeling about what constitutes female beauty for myself and for others. Your children think you are beautiful and that is what counts most of all.
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Such sweet memories! Thanks for sharing!
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What a great post, Jessica! Thanks for this reminder! I'm trying to remind myself in many circumstances where I feel insecure that my body IS beautiful because it carried my two children (23 months and 8 months) at one time and they are a blessing I do not take for granted.
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I struggle with insecurities daily and reading this has made me look at the bigger picture. Thank you.
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This is so true I have a hard time but it's also my insecurities of swimming that get in my way. We just got our first pool so I'm hoping soon to put those behind me and just have fun swimming with the kids. Thanks for sharing this I needed to hear this.
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When our first baby was a year old, she received one of those cute little blow-up kiddie pools. My husband & I were more than happy to relax & cool off in it with her! It began the tradition of always having some kind of kid pool in our backyard on scorching hot summer days - even after the kids out grew the pool (or refused to use it!) My husband & I still will float around in the kiddie pool in our backyard - and my "babies" are 21 & 25. Nothing will stop me from having a "water feature" of some sort when it gets hot! Neither belly bulges or old age ;)! Pools, lakes, any swimming/water play in the summer has always been something we partake in. Good advice for everyone in this post - Don't stop having fun, just because you don't look like a magazine model!!
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Please tell Jessica to wear her bikini again. It will inspire so many other moms! Why can't mothers who have "soft tummys and saggier breasts"! We've birthed children - dammit!! Be proud of this body who created a miracle! ANY mother who is a mother (whether adopted, birthed or foster) can wear a bikini! We are beautiful because we are mothers!!
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Thank you so much for this post. I completely relate! I have been trying to get myself motivated to take my daughter to the pool and I think that you did it. Thank you!
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Such fabulous advice!
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Here, Here!!!
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AMen friend :) What a great post and so uplifting!
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i say screw allthe women with flat bellies and no love handles and were your bikinis. look like a women that isa mother but still a women.
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Thank you for posting that!!! I can relate on almost all accounts and have struggled with the thought of my "mommy body" in a swimsuit. I tried on the bikinis that lay on the floor in my closet; they do NOT fit this breastfeeding mommy body AT ALL!
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I don't have kids or pool in my future, but I definitely need to keep reminding myself not to let my insecurities influence my moments and memories. When steroids changed my appearance it affected my self image so much, and even though I look better now, I have a hard time letting go of not looking how I used to - not looking my best. And I'm teeing really hard to let that go so my memories aren't clouded in that.
Good stuff, Jess. As always.
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OMG three kids later...absolutely can I relate to this. Good for you, knowing the "important" stuff. Wishing our society would get that!!!
Can anyone help me out or give me a suggestion maybee. I was one of the winners from Ali's blog last weekend. Winner of the canvas and vinly covering. Problem is she asked to email all my contact info. Have done that, well like 4 times and get no response??? Wondered if any of you were lucky enough to win and how long it takes for someone to respond OR something. Just have no other way to reach Ali. It seems like it has sent. Even took the time to call our internet provider and they said it may of sent, but may of gone into her spam. Anyway appreciate any insite regarding this. Thank you.
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LOVE this. And I have actually thought about this since reading your thoughts on your blog about it. I was in the pool twice with my daughter in the last four days. We had SO much fun. It really is so worth it. Now I just need to get my husband to pick up my camera and get a few pictures of ME in the pool with her to put with the ones I have taken of him and her. :)
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