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Third Grade Field Trip

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THIRD GRADE FIELD TRIP = 80 KIDS + 20 ADULTS + 2-HOUR BUS RIDE EACH WAY + OREGON COAST AQUARIUM + LUNCH AND EXPLORATION AT THE BEACH

Third Grade Field Trip

I See You

Oregon Coast Aquarium

Third Grade Field Trip

Third Grade Field Trip

I have things I want to say about this adventure but the words seem hard to come by tonight.

Some stories simply aren't easy to document because the layers run deep.

There's my story, his story, and our story (the intersection of the two).

I'm wavering between facts and feelings and the parts that were fun for Simon and others that were a bit tough for my heart to witness. He's getting older and the kids are getting more socially sophisticated and that gap is getting bigger.

And yet, he is happy. He loved having a field trip, loved going to the beach, loved seeing the fish, loved having Doritos in his sack lunch, and he loved having me come along. And more than likely that's really all that matters.

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120 thoughts

  1. Tanya W says…
    06/13/2011

    love your photos Ali esepcially the jellyfish, and yip its sometimes hard to tell the story :)

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  2. dawn says…
    06/13/2011

    Wow to the photos and well said in the writing Ali. Sometimes it is hard for us moms to write when we have too many emotions going thru us. It is hard at this age for boys/girls no matter what they have to deal with in life/home. That's why I want mine to stay little like sweet Anna and then meet again when they are in their 20's, my poor heart can't take the in between these ages,lol.

    I found a cool blog that reminded me of you and your OLW not sure if you know about it but it was new and exciting for me to see it. The post was about making you blurry light shine like hearts, kinda like that one of your Christmas tree this past year. Here is the link let me know if you check it out and it's something new for you too. Here's the link http://craftycpa.blogspot.com/ hope this gives you a new outlook for your OLW album. Happy Monday

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  3. dawn says…
    06/13/2011

    Ali, you will have to scroll down a bit on her blog but it's there. Some of your readers might enjoy this too.

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  4. Pam S. says…
    06/13/2011

    Ali, the older they get, the struggles are still there, but different. when they are young we have more control over the social aspect of things in their lives. as mothers, we are so sensitive to their feelings, their world, their surroundings. they adapt and grow and find their way -- it's just hard to watch sometimes and other times it's magical. take it all in but don't overwhelm yourself with the details. enjoy the moments and let the details work themselves out over time.

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  5. Helen (UK) says…
    06/13/2011

    "he loved having me come along. And more than likely that’s really all that matters."

    This line made my heart catch a little... I know exactly what you mean...

    Keep telling those stories - even if they stay inside :)

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  6. Kim says…
    06/13/2011

    There are times as mothers when our hearts just break for our children; sometimes I think we feel their pain even more intensely than they do. Just being there for them may seem insignificant, but it truly is the best thing we can do.

    Reply 1 Reply
    1. tracey says…
      06/13/2011

      So well said, Kim! :)

  7. linda says…
    06/13/2011

    I know exactly how you feel but you said the most important thing, he was happy and thats what us moms have to remember. The picture on the
    beach is beautiful and does speak volumes

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  8. peggy says…
    06/13/2011

    Simon will find his way. You have taught him to love and respect himself and others. It will often not be easy but you are doing a good job of letting him be himself. It is hard to watch and I wish you all love and happiness.

    Reply 0 Replies
  9. Asha says…
    06/13/2011

    You don't even have to explain further, I understand. My son has had a speech delay, getting better all the time but still behind as far as communicating at his peer's level. I occasionally go into his class to help and other things (he's in 1st). This last time I went in, he was explaining something to the kids around him, getting flustered, stuttering and not getting his point across. I noticed a few of the kids give up and lost their interest and some looked at me and smiled like, "he's trying". It comforted me that they understand but then I thought, "how do they treat him when I'm not around". He's happy, he's growing, it's all we can do from the sidelines is to love them.

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  10. Maritza says…
    06/13/2011

    awesome post. so far all the comments are on target. it never ends, we just get stronger. GOD BLESS

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  11. Lisa W. says…
    06/13/2011

    Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh...field trips. I miss them. My kiddo's are 23...20...and 17yrs. old. But I remember them like they were yesterday. Thanks for sharing:) Have a wonderful day!!!!!

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  12. Irma P. says…
    06/13/2011

    Ali, you've said it best: that it's his story, your story, and our story. No one does it better from documenting it from these different perspectives than you.

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  13. Lisa H says…
    06/13/2011

    Ali-I met you at CKU in Orlando a long time ago--your blog had introduced me to DAN doctors--so I totally get what you are going thru--our little guy is also 9, going into 4th next year. He is doing really really well, but we struggle with friendships, maintaining them, understanding all the social stuff. It is so hard, and my heart breaks for him sometimes. We just want him to be happy and have some friends. One thing I try to remember is growing up isn't really easy for anybody--everyone has people that aren't always nice to them--that doesn't make it ok, but that is the reality. Simon has this wonderful family that he can always count on and he is very very loved and all of that counts for more than you know :-) Hugs...

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  14. Dellie says…
    06/13/2011

    I totally understand how you feel, I believe my 6 yr old son has Aspergers, he has not been formally diagnosed as yet. I have been in and out of specialists appts solidly for 2 years. I see the way other children react to him ( often quite cruel),and the way he has great difficulty building any sort of friendships and it breaks my heart every single day. He is so beautiful and so amazing, but unfortunately so misunderstood by so many at his school.

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  15. Maria says…
    06/13/2011

    I can so totally relate. My son is now in 4th, also with PDD-NOS. I can see the struggles he has with social issues. But he IS happy. 2 years ago, I tried to push it, asking his teacher for help during unstructured times like lunch and recess. It only backfired. Since then, I have learned to just give him some little nudges now and then but give him the final say. He is happier. He does cub scouts and Taekwondo and even challenger baseball. He still does not have friends of his own. But as long as he is happy and he knows we are always there for him, then that should be enough. Tough lesson to learn though.

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  16. madeline St onge says…
    06/13/2011

    Ali it can be hard as they grow up. My mom used to tell me "when they are little you have little problems and when they get big so do the problems" I am sure you both will come through his growing up wonderfully. And then you will be able to tell the story

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  17. susanmcl says…
    06/13/2011

    Oh, my heart aches...nothing to be done at that very second but say a quick prayer, for you, as a witness and the mom, for Simon, who was probably obliviously happy, and for the others that as they grow, they grow.

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  18. Emma says…
    06/13/2011

    I know what your going through, My son has Dyspraxia and finds some things hard in life, his hand writing, speech, and some sport he's find's it hard sometimes to fit in and it breaks my heart but it makes him stronger, and I know he's a far better person for having his issues he understands people and never judges people and is so excepting of people he's 9 and I would love to make his life easier because he works so hard to overcome his issues, but I would never take the dyspraxia away because thats who he is. It took him along time to ride his bike he only started riding it properly about 6 months ago and this weekend he went on a 6 mile bike ride I was so proud of him and slowly in fits into that group. Simon knows you love him and your very proud of him that gets them through so much.

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  19. Laura says…
    06/13/2011

    It is hard to see our children struggle with fitting in. I don't always know what my role is - how to support her decisions and encourage her to take risks.

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  20. Ellen Coker says…
    06/13/2011

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts, feelings and perspectives. My heart seemed to be able to feel and hear each story.

    Reply 0 Replies
  21. Jennifer says…
    06/13/2011

    Ali,

    I teared up a lot while reading your words. My son has Asperger's and is 7 years old and I am starting to notice more of a social gap also. There are times when I get so sad watching him try so hard to interact with his peers and not understanding why they make fun or don't want to play "his" games. Thank you for reminding me to watch for the other things...when he is happy...how much he loves his mama...how much he loves his games. You inspire me to be a better mom!

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  22. Sue says…
    06/13/2011

    The greatest thing about kids is that they bounce back. The greatest thing for Simon is his family. He is so lucky to have such a warm and caring Circle to surround him. (It is hard to watch those kiddos who don't have this and often flounder on their own). Ali, Simon WILL fly and he WILL stumble, but each step is a learning step. As for all of us, his path is HIS path. Continue to Love him, Encourage him, Direct him and Accept him. He will make his way. Watching his grow has been a priviledge and I know I speak for others-We are so proud of him. The trip looked great and I am so envious- as a mid-westerner, beach adventures for us include a 12 hour drive!

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  23. Kathleen Loughran says…
    06/13/2011

    The honesty is what you are not saying touches my heart.Warm hugs and thoughts to all of you.

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  24. Norma says…
    06/13/2011

    I can so relate to your feelings Ali. It is so rewarding, yet so heartbreaking to see them grow and move toward independence. I vividly remember my painful mix of emotions when my oldest very gently and clearly trying not to hurt my feelings told me that he'd really like for me not to go on his 8th grade field trip because he'd like to see what it was like to not have a parent along on one! I have to keep reminding myself that this is my job- to prepare him to spread his wings and fly on his own (well, without Mom anyway but always with God of course!)

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  25. tara pollard pakosta says…
    06/13/2011

    it's so hard watching them grow up....my girls are a bit different than most and didn't really fit in with anyone at school. they complained all the time about having no friends and getting teased, bullied a bit....this year was our first year of homeschooling and they LOVED it. so happy I made that change as this area (and our schools) are a little shady!
    much love to your mama heart!
    xoxo
    tara

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