What Is Real Right Now

Project Life | Week Thirty-Four

WHAT'S REAL RIGHT NOW Simon began the 4th grade last week. The start of school has traditionally been a challenge for him as he navigates a new classroom, new teachers, new structures and a return to old routines here at home but so far he's been doing great. Definitely a bit sleepy this morning as we all adjust to waking up earlier.

WHAT'S REAL RIGHT NOW is that Simon is doing just awesome: riding his bike, reaching out to other kids, being more comfortable in new situations, reading books with joy and excitement. It's so amazing how much he loves to read if it's something he's really interested in - which really is not all that amazing when I remember that my favorite things to read are things I'm really into and excited about. We just need to find more of things for him. A couple Tuesdays ago he read a Shrek book to me for 2 hours while I was working.

WHAT'S REAL RIGHT NOW is that fall is on it's way. I could feel it last night coming in through the half-open windows. I saw it yesterday in a few leaves that are beginning to change colors and drop to the street. I saw it again early this morning when waking to complete darkness.

WHAT'S REAL RIGHT NOW is that Chris and I are having a challenging time. There are many things we are great at together and yet many areas in which we struggle to connect. I want you to know that life is real here - just as it is in your home and your life - and there's good and bad and easy days and hard ones and this happens to be a time in my life that is really hard. I'd totally take your prayers, your positive energy, your wishes of strength and peace, and your compassion. Things are changing here and I'm hoping to face this next chapter of my story with grace and an open heart.

WHAT'S REAL RIGHT NOW is that Anna is two. She's more two than I think Simon ever was - she's got opinions and the language skills to back them up. She's also much more of a boundary tester than Simon. She loves to jump on the couch and asks "Why Mom?" as a response to just about everything. She started a daily Montessori preschool last week and seems to be adjusting just fine. Chris and I dropped her off this morning and she was so happy to show him her school and have him meet her teacher and see her classroom. She's really pretty darn amazing and I'm so happy she's a part of my life.

WHAT'S REAL RIGHT NOW is that I finished both The Help and Little Bee last month. Loved them both. I asked for suggestions via Facebook and Twitter last week and started Cutting For Stone last night. Hoping to go see The Help this weekend.

WHAT'S REAL RIGHT NOW is that this post from my friend Jen Lemen is super inspiring: How To Be Dangerous.

WHAT'S REAL RIGHT NOW are these words: This is the beginning of a new day. You have been given this day to use as you will. You can waste it or use it for good. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever; in its place is something that you have left behind...let it be something good. Author Unknown.

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376 thoughts

  1. Jacque says…
    09/13/2011

    As I read your blog today, I am reminded why yours is always the first I seek each day. You and your honest approach to every thing is an inspiration. Your love of family and life is evident every day. You share the good and sometimes the not so good or the more difficult with the same wonderful approach. You constantly show us what life is truly about. You are appreciated for sharing the real world with us. I wish you love, peace, joy, and understanding during this difficult time and please know that it matters to so many of us even if we only know you through your posts. God bless you and your family!!

    Reply 2 Replies
    1. Robyn says…
      09/14/2011

      Hi Ali,
      Jacque nailed it. You are the blog I sign on to first thing every morning. You are an inspiration in more ways than I can say. My thoughts and positive energy are headed your way, along with millions of others!!

    2. lisa says…
      09/14/2011

      ditto what jacque said.

  2. Tammy B says…
    09/13/2011

    Best wishes to you Ali. Family life can be so hard sometimes but it's always nice to know that there are people who will love and support you no matter what! Thank you for sharing your trials and tribulations with us - we are all human.

    Reply 0 Replies
  3. Kristyn G says…
    09/13/2011

    Praying for you and Chris.

    Reply 0 Replies
  4. madeline St onge says…
    09/13/2011

    Ali
    Sending you positive vibes and lots of hugs and prayers that you and Chris can come to a deeper meaning in your lives. I have been thinking about you since listening to the OLW video, had a feeling something just wasn't right.
    Lots of positive energy coming your way

    Reply 0 Replies
  5. Alexandra says…
    09/13/2011

    I have a special little candle and I light it when I feel moved to pray for special people in my life or for when I think the world needs big love - the candle is lit for you as I type this.
    Sending you love, and hugs and prayers for peace and strength.
    love you.
    A.

    Reply 2 Replies
    1. jen says…
      09/14/2011

      I agree! I love this... I think I'll start the same thing... :)

    2. LauraLee says…
      09/14/2011

      What a lovely ritual, Alexandra.

  6. Lourdes says…
    09/13/2011

    I was trying to think of what to say. To let you know that I have been there, done that, came out on the other side a different and wonderful couple.

    These sentences from your other readers cover all I wanted to share:

    Be strong (be dangerous) and be real.
    Love carries you through…
    Sending you love from the East Coast.
    Rock on Ali.

    Reply 0 Replies
  7. abbeyviolet says…
    09/13/2011

    That is a very real post and we admire you so much for being "real" with us and real about your own life. You are amazing and strong. Hugs, love and prayers around you and yours for strength, wisdom, love and peace.

    Reply 0 Replies
  8. mrydee says…
    09/13/2011

    I just read a book, 10-10-10 by Suzy Welch, which might be of interest to you. It's about making decisions, big and small, by taking into consideration the effects of various decisions on one's life in 10 minutes, 10 months and 10 years. Quite of few of the examples in the book are about decisions involving spouses and family. I will be praying for you and your family.

    Reply 0 Replies
  9. Danielle says…
    09/13/2011

    Thank you for sharing your true & honest life right now. Sometimes it is easy to forget that everyone goes through the good & bad. You & your family are in my thoughts & heart.

    Reply 0 Replies
  10. Sheila says…
    09/13/2011

    Ali, having some struggles myself dealing with some post chemo issues. Feeling a bit sorry for myself. Reading your post made me realize that everyone has struggles and prayers for eachother are important. You have mine.

    Reply 0 Replies
  11. Ginny says…
    09/13/2011

    Praying for your family.

    Reply 0 Replies
  12. Julie says…
    09/13/2011

    Sending prayers your way, Ali. It's easy, as a reader, to create an imagined perfect life for you and other bloggers who are part of our day-to-day routines. Thank you for sharing what is real in your life right now and trusting that manifold compassion will be returned to you through comments and prayer. Wishing you an inner wisdom to guide you as you continue to navigate life's challenges.

    Reply 0 Replies
  13. Kim says…
    09/13/2011

    Will continue to pray for you. Two and a half years ago, I was unsure if my marriage would survive (or if I would survive the pain). Next week we celebrate our 20 year anniversary. It has not been easy, but through prayer and counseling and downright resolve it is still going. Rely on your faith and your family and be true to yourself!

    Reply 0 Replies
  14. Jill says…
    09/13/2011

    Hey Ali,

    Prayers and positive energy to you and Chris (and your fam, too). On days when I'm feeling really down about being single and romanticizing how much more exciting and less lonely (at times) my life would be with a husband, I completely forget that a life with a husband takes a whole other level of skill, compassion and commitment that I haven't even been exposed to yet, let alone practiced. I've decided it's truly brave to be married and really work at making it work. That's humbling and scary to think about, amidst all the fun thoughts about what it would be like. Striving to live with compassion and kindness is the best we can do each day. Thank you for being true and sharing your real-ness with us. Looking forward to Italy :)

    Reply 1 Reply
    1. Jill says…
      09/13/2011

      Hey again, Ali -
      Just listening to your Sept OLW audio and I totally get the feeling that a switch has been thrown and suddenly feeling different - just wrote about my experience with that on my blog on 9/11, actually (http://jill2009.blogspot.com/2011/09/inner-peace.html). It's a great feeling. I didn't trust at all that it would stick around - but for me, it did. So grateful for that :) xoxo

  15. Leah Burgett says…
    09/13/2011

    Praying for you and your family. I am fairly new to your blog and have really enjoyed reading it. Thanks for being so honest!

    Reply 0 Replies
  16. Kerry A says…
    09/13/2011

    I'm not sure what all of Simon's interests are but my son is an avid reader and recently found a book he loved...The Extraordinary Adventures of Ordinary Boy.

    Here's the link: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/hero-revealed-william-boniface/1100616278?ean=9780060774660&itm=3&usri=ordinary%2bboy

    There are currently just 3 books in the series. We also enjoy the series of Seekers by Erin Hunter.

    Reply 1 Reply
    1. tracey m says…
      09/14/2011

      my son loved it, too!!!

  17. susan says…
    09/13/2011

    ali... you have lifted me up so many times with such small thing on your blog i hope this helps in a small way. the power of prayer is amazing. put you burdens to God and trust he will take care of them. it works so much better than trying to do it all by your self. some times all you have to do is, le it go, and know he will take care of you. love you -S

    Reply 0 Replies
  18. Sue says…
    09/13/2011

    Sending prayers to you and your family Ali.

    Reply 0 Replies
  19. Lisa H says…
    09/13/2011

    Ali--sending prayers your way. Disconnect is not a good thing in a marriage and we struggle with it sometimes too. Big hugs to you!
    Lisa

    Reply 1 Reply
    1. juanita says…
      09/13/2011

      Sending peace, prayers and positive vibes to you and yours. May you make it through these difficulties quickly and with your heart and psyche intact.

  20. Wilma Cole says…
    09/13/2011

    Ali, I love your transparency. We all know that there are bumps in the road, and sometimes mountains, to navigate around. I don't know what your religious feelings are, but I must say a deep faith in the living God that created you and sustains you will get you through.

    Reply 0 Replies
  21. Jennifer Levin says…
    09/13/2011

    Thank you for such an honest and real post. I'm sending big hugs and lots of prayers your way. I'm wishing you much comfort and love in the days, weeks and months ahead. ~Jen

    Reply 0 Replies
  22. Yolanda says…
    09/13/2011

    It takes courage to be real. Thank you for being brave. Reading this made my heart clench. I am so hoping that you and Chris can find a positive road forward, however twisty that road appears right now.

    Reply 0 Replies
  23. Theresa S. says…
    09/13/2011

    Ali,

    I appreciate your honesty. I can totally relate to the challenges of marriage. I am divorced (when I was 24--I'm 41 now) and remarried to my current husband for 12 years in November. Marriage is simply HARD. I am sending positive energy, thoughts, and prayers your way.

    Reply 0 Replies
  24. Krys72599 says…
    09/13/2011

    Sending positive thoughts your way, toward you and Chris, hoping you can meet somewhere in the middle to work with and for your lives together.

    Reply 0 Replies
  25. Lucie Campeau says…
    09/13/2011

    No matter what...the Source is in every one of us.No matter what, you inspire Anna & Simon with your love. No matter what, you inspire us. You are in my heart, as is your better half. Soft times for yourself, appease the rest. Hug

    Reply 0 Replies

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