Oh Mr. Morning, We Meet Again
Yesterday, after a particularly challenging few mornings and afternoons, Simon and I had a little meeting to make a responsibility chart. As I got to some of his afternoon responsibilities he said, "May I have the pen?" I handed it over and he wrote his current favorite sentiment: "No School."
Meaning he would like to do anything other than go to school.
"No School's" best friend is "But I'm Tired."
Sometimes they pal around with "I Don't Care," "NO," or the occasional random friend "Journey To The Soul" (a long story involving Shrek The Third and what Simon originally thought was "Jeremy The Soil".
Each are said in the loveliest of whining voices with a pinch of tears every now and then thrown in for good measure.
Just about two years ago (almost to the day I realized when I went looking for the link) I posted a quick letter to Mr. Morning Challenge - letting him know that it was time for him to move on. Maybe there is something about this week in October that is just perfect for grouchiness in the morning. Right now we are having the distinct pleasure of an afternoon challenge as well.
According to his teachers his behavior at school has been good. They don't seem to be hearing as many "No" responses.
At home though, it's been a challenge.
My Mom has been staying with us the last few days and came to Simon's 2nd Grade Open House. Always fun to see the classroom - check out his desk, chat with his main teacher, see what parts he is excited about right now.
For all the "No School" talk in both the mornings and the afternoons there are lots of things he seems to be enjoying: running at recess with some other kids, playing with a chess board (not really playing right now but having fun putting all the pieces on the board and playing wizard chess), getting really good at math, and being the door holder (next best thing to being "line leader").
And as we were driving home from the swimming pool last night and as I said the prayer with him as he went to bed one of my favorite everyday life quotes from Mary Jean Iron kept going through my head:
Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so. One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return.
It is such an amazing life perspective that treasure of a normal day.
So today, I am expressing gratitude for these normal days.
From a geriatric mom of 4....my kids were usually able to keep it together well at school, and needed to let it out a bit at home-- crankiness, being a little contrary now and then. Maybe they knew it was safe to let down the guard in a place where the consequences were deeply rooted in love.
I love the Door Manager sign-- congrats on that responsibility. I miss the good stuff from elementary school-- just finished Homecoming here. High School brings its own wild fun and silliness too
Happy Fall!
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i love the little prayer at the end, so true. each normal day is a treasure in itself. my kids go through the grouchy and no school thing too, it passes, thankfully! have a great normal day!
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THis was a great post. Thanks.
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Boy do I know what this is like.
My new favorite mini mantra,
"Don't forget to breathe"
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If it makes you feel any better...we are having the same...issues in Ohio. Three kids, three different buildings...and three different ways of trying to put off the inevitable. Loving my normal days, for they will be gone too soon.
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What if I'm the one that's crabby? :)Thanks again for a spot-on post and inspiration to be in the moment.
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I know Autism brings its challenges, but just so you know, my girls are VERY challenging in the morning and REALLY challenging after school, well one of them in particular, the other one is very easy going for the most part. It's so hard when they have their own agenda and personalities! I hope your little talk worked!!! I can't imagine how hard it must be some days! You are a great mom!
tara
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great post...thanks for sharing.
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Thanks for sharing this...My kindergartener has been doing great at school, but when she gets home, she releases everything she has kept inside for the past 3 hours and loses it. She has become a very emotional mess, with high highs and low lows. Tuesday she cried off and on for about 6 hours (all after school). I kept myself together (very zen) for most of the day, but lost it at the very end (when we had to be somewhere and I was getting no traction with kind and gentle). Man, I wish I didn't yell and "get big" on her, but I did.
I'm sure when we hit those teenage years, I will want to jump back to these days in a second, but right now it is hard.
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Oh Rachel - the getting "no traction with kind and gentle" is very familiar to me.
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Love the quote. I'm going to have to keep that one.
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Love that quote! Thanks for sharing
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I think I'm going to print out the Normal Day thing... I just found out my daughter is going to start (our equivalent of) kindergarten next September rather than next January. As she's my baby, and she'll only be 4! the end of April, I admit I've shed more than a couple tears at the thought. The daily My Little Pony parties suddenly have much more significance to me. I still think 9-3pm 5 days/week is an awful lot to handle when you're so little, but I guess we'd better get ready...
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Love the quote, I also will have to keep that one. Thanks.
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I remember the letter last year to 'Mr Morning Challenge'---I also wrote one---apppently he moved on because I'm happy to say he'snot showed up this year.:)
Although my son still hates school and his favorite saying is "If I ws President, I would say NO SCHOOL"
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..so beautiful that which you've written. I needed to be reminded.
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This too will pass . . . We call it the October Blues at our house. I think that it is partly due to the newness of school wearing off, and the reality that the school/home daily schedule is the new "norm" and not the much more appealing summer/home more laid back schedule. Stay strong and stick with your schedule.
Amy
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Great quote. TFS.
I get the "I'm Tired" said in the whinniest voice possible, followed by the lower lip pout. Seems to happen every week on a Thursday, especially in October & November.
Hoping the 'chart' works for you. It worked for me until he decided to hide it (under the refrigerator-I found it a couple days later).
((HUGS))
~Pino
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Well Said. Love the quote and I need to remember that today and always. Especially during my "terrible two" moments.
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We are right there with yoU!!!! The barometric pressure has changed in the air bringing allergies galore for me and many more morning and afterschool challenges for my sons. It has been a rough two weeks. I know this will soon pass. Your reminding us to stay in the normal moment of our everyday resonates. I watched Nie on Oprah yesterday and now this small refrain had me teary-eyed that I need to slow down and enjoy our normal more. Thanks
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As the mom of a Special Needs student, I hear you on the challenges different parts of the day present. I've heard it said that kids "let it all out", so to speak, at home because that's where they feel safe. My theory is that our kids have more to let out because it's so much harder for them to keep their focus all day long. The anticipation of that, and the let down at the end of the day can be SUCH a challenge. :)
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I love this post. Sometimes looking at the scrap magazines you only see that perfect smile, that perfect day - but documenting the bad ones seem like such a good idea too. To acknowledge it, to record it, and hopefully move on. I'm having a heck of a time with my 6 year old right now and it's so comforting to hear that I'm not the only one.
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We are having "one of those weeks" too, thanks for the reminder to be thankful in all things for the wonderful gift we've been given in our children!
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I agree about the comment of the newness of school starting has passed and the reality has truly set in that getting up early each day is here to stay for another year. And, I love the Normal Day quote (it's my favorite) and has special meaning as my son has autism. Most people who don't experience autism first hand cannot truly know how wonderful a normal day is for us. I've been meaning to make a plaque by my front door with that poem and it's on the first page of my "Week in the Life" book from last year.
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Your list of how the afternoon/evening goes is exactly how it is in my house. I had to establish it because things were getting so out of hand. I hated doing it cause I wanted the girls to "be kids" after school. But I found that having a schedule allowed them to be kids in their free time more than not having one did. Ugh! This parenting thing is not getting easier...it's getting harder!!! With this schedule everything actually gets DONE and the girls have so much more time to play. We aren't sitting at the table doing homework for two hours and fighting and crying, pulling teeth just to get thru something that should only take a half and hour. Thanks for sharing!
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