"And I'll just go for it."
I had one of those experiences with Simon last night on our way to the swimming pool reminding me once again that he is just downright awesome.
Drive-through McDonald's is one of our things. We go through a pretty stable routine each time: ordering a Happy Meal for the toy (especially Kung Fu Panda toys - he and Chris saw the movie last weekend) and chicken nuggets; talking about the number one window + the number two window; choosing between OJ, chocolate milk, or the occasional Sierra Mist.
Let me step back a minute and preface this by saying we have been having some major food battles lately. I hate the word battle because that implies a winner and a loser...our goal is to get him to try something new at each meal and take one very small bite as a "no thank you" bite (along with getting some variety into his diet). Trust me, it has been one of the biggest challenges in our experience as parents.
Back to last night and the story at hand. I put in the regular order for a Happy Meal with chicken nuggets. After pulling out and heading down the road I hand the box back to him and he pulls out a cheeseburger. On past adventures this could have resulted in a major upset (or me simply turning around and going back to McDonald's to correct our order). I see the burger in the rearview mirror as I am checking the clock to see how much time we have to make it to the pool before the "sorry we are full" sign goes up. In the span of seconds I am wondering to myself which is going to be worse: not getting the expected chicken nuggets or not getting to swim?
But he didn't freak out.
"Hey, here's a hamburger," he said and started to pass it to me. No whining. No crying. No freaking out.
Somehow I managed to say, "How about trying that cheeseburger tonight?" I braced a bit as I waited for the issue to escalate.
He simply said, "Okay."
It was an "okay" in a super cheerful manner that demonstrated no indication of ever having issues with different foods. At that point I should have just pulled over and did the craziest celebration dance possible that he was even okay with the idea of opening the package let alone take a bite.
I tried super hard not to make a big deal about. "That sounds like a plan," I said as I peeked into the rear-view mirror to see if he was really going to actually for real take a bite. And he did. No big deal. No fanfare. No saying "this is gross." No protesting. Just a little nibble bite along the edge and then he set it back down on the plastic wrapper in his lap.
"Did you like it?" I asked?
"I did."
In my head I was freaking out. Holy cow this could be it. This could be the breakthrough we have been hoping for and working towards related to not making a huge deal out of trying a new food.
"Are you going to eat some more?"
"Yes. I like hamburgers."
We drove along and he munched on his french fries amidst telling me stories about the Higglytown Heroes episode he had been watching on the computer before leaving for the pool.
"Are you going to eat any more hamburger?" I asked as we continued on our way.
"Yes, I'll just go for it."
In reality he didn't even hit the meat, cheese, ketchup or anything except the bun.
But man, what a great start.
Go for it, Simon, go for it.
GOOSEBUMPS!!! Congrats Edwards Family on such a huge milestone!!! GO SIMON!! You ROCK with your AWESOME-NESS!
Cheers!
Abby
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Ali,
We have two boys; one that eats almost anything and one that exists on dairy, fruit and air. Having said that, we have always made them take a "polite bite" because you can never be too sure if that little bite becomes your favorite food. Our eater has found many foods that he loves this way. Our air-eater, yeah, not there yet. Way to Go SIMON!!!
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Oh, I know that happy dance feeling, and having to play it cool. Big step forward, maybe two steps back next time, but he will remember. We just had a similar deal with my 8 yo - mean mommy made her try one measly bite of BROWN rice...and then we read Green Eggs and Ham.
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What a cool day for you and Simon. Even though we don't have near the struggle to deal with that you do, I can relate to your experience about knowing there is a battle ahead and bracing yourself for a backlash, lol. It's so nice when they surprise you, isn't it? Huge congrats to Simon and looking forward to hearing how the food thing continues...
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WOO HOO ... Go Simon! Congrats!!
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What a HAPPY MOMENT! I have a picky eater too, but seeing her sister eat most kinds of food makes her explore. I used to tell her she can't leave the table until she's done but it stresses both of us, so now I don't sweat it. They will come around and eat. Now she's eating the food she doesn't even want to taste before. :-)
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What a wonderful story, my little one is the opposite she eats the burger and leaves the bun. Children really are priceless.
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What an awesome story. I am sure you're heart was throbbing at the time and I really appreciate how you kept being calm for Simon's sake... I guess you're approach to life that resonate throughout your blog and books is getting to him. You are setting a great example for him !!!
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That's so great! Go Simon!
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Awesome! I have four children and they have all gone through stages of picky eating. My eight year old son Jack, who is clearly healthy (thank God!) eats very few different things. Still, my 17 year old likes many, many things now and will try everything so my experience is they grow out of it. I really believe for mine, it's a sensory issue - they are all people who feel sock bumps and hate tags. I think they just experience sensory input very intensely. Over time I think this fade, and they have enough positive experiences that they can anticipate positive surprises.
I also think that our weaknesses are often connected to our strengths - my children are exceptionally aware of beauty, music, the smells of places. I see art in their future, and I hope they always experience the world so fully.
You're patience is wonderful Ali. Thanks for sharing such a vulnerable moment of heroic and everyday parenting with us.
Susan
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What a proud Mommy moment, Ali! Glad you wrote it down to remember the details. Way to go Simon. I bet it feels really good to take such a HUGE step. Thanks for sharing.
Joy
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How wonderful is that! My son is very fussy eater and loves his routines... so I know what a HUGE event that little moment was. Way to go Simon, congrats Ali :-) Just a word: remember progress sometimes is a series of small steps and an occasional step back, which is not an indication of backsliding... but of just how huge the task is :-)
Anne
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Awesome! I have four children and they have all gone through stages of picky eating. My eight year old son Jack, who is clearly healthy (thank God!) eats very few different things. Still, my 17 year old likes many, many things now and will try everything so my experience is they grow out of it. I really believe for mine, it's a sensory issue - they are all people who feel sock bumps and hate tags. I think they just experience sensory input very intensely. Over time I think this fade, and they have enough positive experiences that they can anticipate positive surprises.
I also think that our weaknesses are often connected to our strengths - my children are exceptionally aware of beauty, music, the smells of places. I see art in their future, and I hope they always experience the world so fully.
You're patience is wonderful Ali. Thanks for sharing such a vulnerable moment of heroic and everyday parenting with us.
Susan
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Children amaze me. Their thought process, their love, it's just downright awesome! I feel blessed that even through my four year olds cancer treatment, she still ROCKS! May these memories and milestones continue to suprise you. :)
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That is just the best thing. I got teary just reading it. Go for it Simon, just go for it!
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I can totally understand why this is such a big victory because of my own son who has autism.
I loved reading about this experience. Thanks so much for sharing it.
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awesome moment... thanks for sharing it. I love the comment at the end and it brought tears to my eyes.
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What a great day for you both!
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How very cool is that?! Go Simon Go!! (I think we should also have pics of you doing the celebration dance Ali!!)
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WHOOHOO! Isn't being a parent the most amazing thing? You handled it like a pro Ali! Autism or not, kids have so many quirks that we have to negotiate and sometimes it is all about how well WE handle the situation that dictates how well THEY handle it! Way to go on that burger Simon! :)
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Hey Ali! I work for TypePad Support, and I didn't see a Help Ticket opened regarding the loading issue, so I thought I'd come and leave a comment for you. This is actually a known issue and it's only affecting Internet Explorer - you'll want to go ahead and remove your ShareThis widget and republish your blog. Then you can add it back again! If you have any other issues at all, just open a ticket and the team will be happy to help!
And go Simon! Trying something new - even a cheeseburger bun - is a huge accomplishment. :-)
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Hang in there! It gets better. My son only ate 2 or 3 things and had serious texture issues. Little by little he started to try new things (ex first taco meat, then added cheese, then into a shell...) He has gotten so adventurous that on our last vacation he was ordering for himself and eating things like escargot, duck and lobster! Just take baby steps. Simon will discover that there are wonderful new tastes waiting for him!
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It's all about the little victories in autism isn't it?
My sister and I (not sure if you remember us from CKU-Detroit) have been experiencing those too. At our house we have had some anger issues. Caleb was mad at his Daddy because he made him take the time to use the potty (7 year olds would rather play on the water slide than potty!), after he went and we got cleaned up he went up to his Daddy, on his own... and said "Daddy, I'm sorry I was mean at you." Hugged him, then went on. I was in quiet tears and my husband asked if I made him do that. No, I did not.
Little victories.
Sounds like our sons are winning.
Hugs,
Jo Ellen
p.s. we have major food issues too. I think I may start your idea (try something new every day).
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Go for it Simon!
awesome!
kiss kiss
m
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I have a mildly autisic son, with major food issues. I can totally relate, I called my mom one night, screaming "HE ATE A GREEN BEAN"
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