AE | The Weekend Lens

lego

One of the things I've learned over the last 10 years, through all these adventures in memory keeping, is that my camera can be a refuge.

This past week, when I was feeling particularly out of sorts, I grabbed my camera and started photographing details around here. Life as it is. There's something to that for me - something that seeps into the cracks of my sadness and releases it just a bit.

Often it feels like taking a deep cleansing breath. An opportunity to remember the why.

kids

I'm sure some of you out there stop taking photos when times are hard - I know that's happened to me before too. It's easy to not see anything good in the midst of challenges and struggles that can sometimes be consuming.

life

Picking up the camera and seeing the little details is good for my heart. It's a challenge, a distraction, and a focus on a practice I love.

lego at night

It doesn't change any of the other real things that are happening, but it brings me back to the goodness, the positive, the fullness, the life still moving on all around me.

grandma visit

I hope you had a chance to pick up your camera this past weekend and I hope you captured some images that remind you just how totally amazing life is.

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131 thoughts

  1. Christine says…
    09/19/2011

    I agree with everyone else--it is heartbreaking to "see" you so sad. It is part of your story, though, and documenting it helps you really feel it all and work through it. It gives a great picture for your children in future years as well. Sometimes our stories take twists we never expect or want, but they are still worth telling. I keep praying for you all.

    Christine

    Reply 0 Replies
  2. susan garner says…
    09/19/2011

    I go on your blog everyday and you are in my thoughts.

    Reply 0 Replies
  3. Pam says…
    09/19/2011

    So sad for you that life is hard right now. Sometimes they just have to be lived through, one day at a time. Sending you good thoughts that you will come through this and find the joy again.

    Reply 0 Replies
  4. Kate S says…
    09/19/2011

    Ali - Thank you for being real during the struggles in your own life. I appreciate that you are honest about your life. Too often it feels like people are hiding the struggles of real life, and I think it keeps us from really connecting. I hope for the best for you and your family, and appreciate that you are sharing your life with us through everything.

    Reply 0 Replies
  5. Erin says…
    09/19/2011

    That seems to be the time when I get the best pictures. Thanks for sharing such intimate pictures!

    Reply 0 Replies
  6. Aimee Confer says…
    09/19/2011

    Ali,
    I am thinking of you during this difficult and trying time in your life. Stay strong!

    Reply 0 Replies
  7. chris says…
    09/19/2011

    Ali, You are breaking my heart. Time heals. Trite, but true. Just hang on with all that you've got. Remember the old picture of the kitten hanging on to the tree branch with all of it's might? Life feels that way sometimes. My best to you and yours.

    Reply 0 Replies
  8. madeline St onge says…
    09/19/2011

    Ali I am so sorry your heart is so heavy right now and and sending prayers that things can get better really soon for you. (((((((((((ALI)))))))))) sweet girl

    Reply 0 Replies
  9. Nita says…
    09/19/2011

    Ali, I totally understand where you are. My marriage has gone through some very tough times this summer (still is). I really cut back on my picture taking, but am trying to get better. I snapped a photo on the day my world came crashing down and I honestly cannot even remember doing it. I was in such a cloud, and I do not want to make the mistake of missing the good stuff because of the tough times right now. Wishing you all the best.

    Reply 0 Replies
  10. Crystal says…
    09/19/2011

    Ali

    Turn to His word and you will find all the answers you need. Thinking about you and praying for your family during this time.

    Reply 0 Replies
  11. Jane says…
    09/19/2011

    Thinking of you right now Ali. As someone that suffers from bipolar depression, I understand not wanting to pick up the camera during those low times. Maybe next time I'll try to force myself, who knows it just may help. Hoping you find peace soon.

    Reply 0 Replies
  12. Sharon in California says…
    09/19/2011

    Ditto and warm hugs to all the posters...wow.

    In 2010 I suffered several losses of dear friends, family members including my four legged son. I found that I too, took photos to see what was good in my life and what I had gained. The most poignant was when my youngest brother had been killed by a red light runner in 2010. My siblings, parents and kids got together to honor him several months later to celebrate his life - the funeral period was a blur to all of us. I took photos of his kids (all teens) and those are the best photos I have ever seen of them. they are beautiful, heartfelt and honest imprints of what he gave us as a family and to the world. When I am sad or missing him or in a funk, I pull out those photos and they make me smile and feel all the love I have for them and for him.

    Even difficult change brings you goodness. That is what I have learned. Its sometimes hard to see, but those are the windows and doors opening to us and pointing us in a new direction/adventure. Embrace every moment and everyday.

    Thank you everyone for such wonderful and loving posts. And to you Ali...for your inspiration everyday!

    Reply 0 Replies
  13. Paola Norman says…
    09/19/2011

    Hugs..

    Reply 0 Replies
  14. Stacy says…
    09/19/2011

    Ali, it saddens me that you're hurting so much. The pictures speak volumes. And let me add that even through your sorrow I can tell that you are a such strong woman. I will continue to keep you and your family in prayer. Just remember, as I often remind myself during difficult times...This, too, shall pass. God bless you!!

    Reply 0 Replies
  15. Tracy says…
    09/19/2011

    Ali, I really appreciate this post. We lost our home 2 weeks ago in the Bastrop, TX wildfire. We had 5 minutes to get out of our house. One thing I was able to grab was my camera. I had to leave behind a lot of scrapbooks (including baby books I made for my 2 sons). It's heartbreaking and I haven't felt like picking up my camera during this time of shock and starting over. All of the time I put into those scrapbooks are gone. I wish I had just 10 extra minutes so that I could have grabbed them. Becky Higgins had something on her blog about documenting tragedies. It was written before the fire that took our house on Sept. 4th and when I read it, I thought it rad crazy to even think of wanting to document a tragedy. Now that we are living through one, I'm starting to think it's not such a bad idea. I mean, this event has changed us forever...it's probably something that should be captured by my camera.

    Reply 2 Replies
    1. Barb in AK says…
      09/20/2011

      Tracy, I'm so sorry for your great loss, but thankful that you and your family are safe. God be with you all as you begin to recover.

    2. Jessica says…
      09/19/2011

      So sad to hear that! I'm thinking of you & your family....I can't even imagine.

  16. Patty says…
    09/19/2011

    Thanks for the "a-ha" moment, Ali. Keeping the camera in exile has only added to the sadness and emptiness. Thank you - it's hiatus ends right now.
    Wishing you peace....

    Reply 0 Replies
  17. julie macneil says…
    09/19/2011

    Ali,
    my heart hurts for you, please know that God is there for you and He will never let you down or leave you alone! He will be your abundant compensation in every situation!!!! i pray that the Holy Spirit will hold you in His arms and bring you peace and rest to your mind and heart and spirit - you are SO loved!!!!!!

    Reply 0 Replies
  18. sandra says…
    09/19/2011

    sending you a HUG.

    Reply 0 Replies
  19. Denise KC says…
    09/19/2011

    Hang in there Ali

    Reply 0 Replies
  20. rhonda says…
    09/20/2011

    So thinking of you and praying for peace,content and courage to conquer this difficult time.

    Reply 0 Replies
  21. Meghann says…
    09/20/2011

    I am definitely one to put down my camera if I am not having a good day, but this is a reminder to me that life is still happening all around me, and it is still important to capture it, no matter my mood.

    Reply 0 Replies
  22. Kate Ware says…
    09/20/2011

    Ali --

    Thinking of you and sending tons of lovingkindness and prayers your way. {{Hugs}}

    Reply 0 Replies
  23. Anthea says…
    09/20/2011

    Thanks for the reminder that a photo is a memory whether it be in dark or light times. Thinking of you and your family.

    Reply 0 Replies
  24. Barb in AK says…
    09/20/2011

    Ali, I'm sorry things seem to be in a turmoil for you at this time. I'm lifting prayers for you and your family. God bless.

    Reply 0 Replies
  25. Maureen says…
    09/20/2011

    Ali, you have always been the one to document the little joys in life. I'm glad that despite your sadness, you have the ability to cherish what IS good, right here, right now. If I were able to sit with you and your Mom I would. Sit through it. A part of my heart breaks for you. ♥ Maureen

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