Things I Am Learning (or re-learning)

Oh, so true... I have a 1 year old and an almost 4 year old. It took a good 6 months before the weeping and the sobbing and the adjusting mellowed. I missed my oldest - desperately - somedays. And sleep deprivation compounds EVERYTHING. Having 2 children is an amazing gift! But no one ever tells you what an adjustment it is! It's hard. Period. And you learn to do a LOT of things while nursing the second! There should be an olympic event JUST for nursing mommas! Hang in there - take things moment by moment.

Ali Anna is absolutely beautiful. Simon sounds like he is going to be a wonderful big brother.It is amazing how fast they grow. I am sorry you had a bad day yesterday. I have 3 boys and when I have a frustrating day I thik of the song "It won't be like this for long" by Darius Rucker and think how sad it will be once they are gone and the house is quiet. I know I will e wishing for all those frustrating days again.
Take care of yourself and your beautiful family! You are truly blessed.

As much as it is easy to say "sit back and enjoy" sometimes it is hard too. Those first six weeks of each child is a blur to me. Luckily, I had my blog to look back on. Some posts were fuzzy memories and some were insightful. I can relate to this post on nearly every level. And I know that weekly there is "one of those days" and we get by and come out on the other side richer and better. She is utterly gorgeous and looks delicious (for lack of a better word!) When the going gets tough-- the tough go snuggle. ;) Do you have a sling or carrier? I LOVED LOVED LOVED the Moby from this age thru 5 months. Kept the baby close to me but my hands were completely worry free and able to do other things with my other child. Also, it provided the teeny baby the comfort of being near my heart and chest -- that close snuggle they love. Check 'em out if you are interested!

First, Congrats on your sweet baby girl! :-)
The transition from one to two (or three, in my case) is a tough one. It's amazing how it all just works.
Hoping that things calm down for your boy-boy. Transitions are so tough!

I loved reading your list. It took me back 30 years. Someone once told me that the transition from one child to two is a leap.
It's so hard to function when your tired and they were right its huge. It's a day at a time,embrace the good and the bad. Reading your post and looking back reminded me that these are moments to treasure.

Congratulations Ali! Anna is absolutely beautiful. I have a two year old son and it is hard to remember him being a newborn. I think #18 rings so true and I wish I had had that insight when my son was so new. :-)
Blessings to you and your family from Georgia!

Oh Ali, I remember those first days and how hard (and wonderful) they can be. Don't know if you're a country music fan, but pull up Darius Rucker's "It won't be like this for long", it's perfect for where you are right now.

Sounds like Baby Anna is a joy. Thank you for sharing your life with us, your family is an inspiration. My grandson was having major behavior problems. We discovered he is very sensitive to Red Dye 40. It wasn't until he spent a month with me last summer & I began putting 2+2 together that we began to suspect his behavior might be food related. When you research Red Dye 40, you begin to see patterns. It is in everything - even some antibiotics. We have worked very hard taking this from his diet & the results are amazing. Even he can tell a difference. At Christmas I put a multi-color lollipop in his stocking & he said he couldn't eat it because he didn't want his head to hurt. You might want to see if there is a food/behavior relationship to Simon's behavior. Can you believe school lunches are loaded with Red Dye 40?

I had a lot of the same feelings after having my 2nd (a girl) and my first is a boy. Especially #7, I remember coming home from the hospital, sitting on the couch with my newborn sobbing because I felt guilty for having another child and I felt like I was abandoning my son. I remember my mom saying to me, 'before long, Justin will not remember a time before Isla and they will have so much fun as they get older". She was right. He adjusted, we all did. I give them the same amount of love and time, it's hard sometimes but I do it. Now I'm trying to decided, 'should we have a 3rd?'
Enjoy every moment!

When my youngest was born, my oldest was in Kindegarten. He too would wake up and say he was sick so he could stay home - he had this idea that the baby and I went out to eat, shopping, etc. all day while he was at school. We let him stay home once, and we stayed at home. I reminded him that when he is sick, we can't go places! He hasn't asked to say home since!!
good luck! :)

I can so relate to your thoughts today. We are 5 weeks or so away from welcoming our newest addition. Remember to just sit and enjoy these first few precious weeks. There is nothing more important (including this blog which doesn't mean we won't really miss you) than just sitting and holding your new baby. Thanks for sharing so much these first few weeks!
Monica

Ali, love your 'this too shall pass' approach. Best wishes, Helen

I have injoyed this glimpse of your new life. Your new family. DD is expecting anyday now with #3 son. So I am getting so excited. Enjoy!

"the kids" was a favorite of mine too. And I totally know what you mean about Simon seeming so much bigger once you had Anna. Same thing happened with us...you are told it will happen but until you experience it, you can't completely understand. Enjoy this time because it goes so fast. Our little Anna will be six months soon and I can't believe how big she looks compared to your little Anna!

Wow Ali, sounds like you are having a VERY typical experience with kiddo number #2. I can related to each and every item in your list - with the exception of the daughter one. Makes me think maybe another try is warrented. How blessed you are and how beautiful this new phase in your life :)) Enjoy every moment 9except the weepy ones, those you can just throw out the window!). Marcia

I think you just described my life about 10 months ago to the T. My son was 2.5 when my daughter was born. I know he was younger than Simon, but it was still hard nonetheless. The best advice given to me about having a second child was if they are both crying at the same time, or the older needs attention at the same time the little one is crying, go to the older first. He will remember being passed over for the baby, but the baby won't remember crying a few more minutes while you give older brother the extra attention they so desperately need during this time. That was such a hard time for me but now looking back, it seems like ages ago. I wish you the best of luck, peace, sanity, and silence during this time!

Anna is beyond beautiful. What a precious, gorgeous blessing to sleep that soundly.
Unmet expectations are so frustrating, but do your best to "Let Go and Let God." When you need to cry, go for it. Sometimes a good cry is the best medicine.
Continued blessings...

Glad that you are all doing well - be gentle to yourself and let yourself go through all the feelings (ups and downs) of these first few weeks - it's a roller coaster for sure. Lots of love to you all.

Oh, yeah, #7. I remember in my weepy moments after the birth of my 2nd daughter, when I was nursing & couldn't get up to attend to the first and had to ask her to wait, that I was thinking, "Why have I done this thing? Why have I ruined her world, my firstborn?" We all adjusted and are much the better for it (who shouldn't learn patience, after all?!) and today, when I see my "kids" playing together & having each other I, of course, wouldn't change it for anything! Hope your melancholy is short-lived.

Ali,
Having a daughter is such an amazing thing! I have 2 only 12 1/2 months apart in age and my oldest will be 2 next month. I find spending the same amount of alone time with them to be difficult some days. I admit that sometimes while I am holding my youngest that I get sad thinking this is my last one and I want to savor more of it. I get to be a stay at home mom this time around and I love seeing all the things I missed with my other daughter.
I swear at least once or twice a week I stop and look at my babies and tear up. I love them so much it can be overwhelming sometimes.
Congrats again and thanks for sharing this very special time with us. I look forward to seeing what you share with us on your blog!

I love your list! And I see so much Simon in her!!
#4 - I STILL get a thrill from that - it never went away for me, so overwhelmed and thankful for it I am
#5 - So so true. Even a two year old seems huge when that baby comes home. It's the funniest thing.
#15 - This is so so normal - in all kids. Take heart
So happy for you!!!

Yes, #18 is so true. Enjoy your time with baby...it goes so fast! I definitely had to take "a day at a time" with my second child. I know it is "so" hard to not feel guilty for giving your time to the baby...but in time Simon will understand. You are doing a great job by giving him one-on-one time...it is good. Such a sweet picture of your Anna!

Your heartfelt blog entires are always why I keep coming back to read your blog each day. You write from the heart and it's so refreshing. Having our second child on the way, your insight into this new world of "kids" has made me more excited to welcome our child. Thank you for your honest and wonderful post!

PS - your right - shopping for girl stuff is so much funner than shopping for boy stuff!!
Simon is going to do amazing as a big brother.
Hope today is a good day

PPS - Anna is beautiful